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Weekends With Winter

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Party of One: 10 Activities for the Independent Spirit

in Inspiration, Uncategorized on 01/10/14

photo 1

Friday nights are my jam! They mark the end of a long work week and the beginning of the freedom the weekend brings. You can usually find me out celebrating the arrival of the weekend somewhere with friends,  but I also feel totally justified lazing around the house, getting some writing done and feeling no guilt for indulging in that  bottle glass of wine that’s been sitting in the back of my fridge for a week. Wait who am I kidding wine doesn’t sit in my kitchen for a week :/

A couple Fridays ago I found myself home alone with nothing to do and nobody to celebrate the coming weekend with. It was the most liberating feeling I’ve felt in a long time! I didn’t know what to do with myself, should I read a book, write in my journal, get lost in all the pretty stuff on Pinterest? The possibilities were endless!

In the end I grabbed a glass of rosé, pulled out some of my fave DVD’s and had a movie night all by lonesome ( I even took a picture to commemorate the occasion, see above). However lonesome I wasn’t, I loved the “me” time, I felt relaxed because I didn’t  have to entertain or pick a movie that appealed to someone else and besides I kinda like myself so spending time with myself was easy 🙂

All of this alone time got me thinking about other cool things I could do by myself. I mean, a lot of couples have date nights, so why not come up with a “solo date without a mate but I’ll be straight” night?  I began by compiling a list of things that I could do alone but that wouldn’t make me feel lonely, and well you know when I start compiling lists around here I have to share it with you guys.

But before I begin I’m going to need you to be open minded about this list. There may be things on here that you don’t think are enjoyable, however,  the point of this list is to  gradually make you comfortable with doing things alone. I’m not going to suggest going out to dinner at a 5 star restaurant right away because if you’re like me that was absolutely terrifying the first time I did it.

So instead of throwing you in the fire, I’m going slowly guide you there. Here’s my list…

1. Visit a Museum

Museums are generally places where people are far too distracted looking at pretty art to be worried about who’s  with who. So if you have an irrational fear of being judged for going out alone, don’t fear. People are probably far too busy judging the art to be worried about judging you. Plus a lot of museums have tours you can go on with larger groups so you could just blend in with that 6th grade class on their field trip. Sure you may look creepy but you won’t look lonely.

2. Go to a Movie

Movies are dark, nobody is paying attention to who is sitting with who  because guess what! Everyone is probably too busy paying attention to the movie! So treat yo self! Go to that romantic comedy your boo probably rolls his eyes at every time you mention. Plus you  don’t have to worry about getting caught because your purse is stuffed with snacks for 2 ( now you know what they charge for popcorn at the movies is robbery so don’t look at me sideways).

3. Go On a Romantic Picnic

OK hear me out before you roll your eyes. Is there a park near you big enough where you can find a secluded space, lay out a blanket and just relax? If you don’t know I urge you to find it!  Picture this-You at the park on a lovely crisp Fall day,  a pre-packed lunch,I(‘m thinking a sandwich, or a salad and maybe a tumblr of wine) and a good book, relaxing under a beautiful sky. It’s a little slice of heaven. You have nature all around you, and most likely if there are loads of people, they’re much too busy playing with their kids or walking their dog to notice you. I love experiencing nature alone, I love to take it in and notice things I probably wouldn’t notice in the company of another person. Hanging at the park is perfect for this!

4. Sign up for a Class

Is there a skill you’ve been dying to learn but can’t find anyone who shares your interest?Floral arranging, photography, underwater basket weaving? Whatever it is, look online and see if it’s currently being offered at the local community college or art space near you. You’ll find that most times these classes are all attended by folks who are also solo. Plus you may make a new friend with the same interest in the process.

5.Volunteer

I’m of the opinion that when you’re down in the dumps one of the best things you can do is to take the focus off of yourself. Volunteering is the perfect way to do this and what’s even more perfect is that you don’t need anyone to do it with. One Thanksgiving I felt I didn’t have a lot to be thankful for ( I can be a bit dramatic at times) so I volunteered at a local shelter. I was way too busy helping out to be worried about what I was going through and after having spent time with people who had REAL WORLD problems I realized mine were small and I was straight trippin! So find a charity close to your heart to volunteer your time, or be of service to someone  you love. You don’t need anyone’s company to do that!

6. Go to the Library

It’s common knowledge that you have to be quiet at the library so for that reason alone this would be a great date to make with yourself. Plus library’s are so cool because everything there is free! You can take your laptop there and use up the wifi for free, check out a book for free, some library’s also let you check out movies…FOR FREE! Plus I just love the history of a library, all that wealth of information at your fingertips, don’t judge,  it’s exciting for a book dork like me 🙂

 7.Get Spiritual

More spiritual then religious,however, I respect the beliefs of everyone, and if you belong to a church, synagogue or religious group, I urge you to try heading to a service by yourself. In the past when I’ve gone to church service with friends or family I’ve often worried about being judged for getting emotional during a sermon or staying after to ask for prayer. However when I went alone I felt a lot more open to the lesson that was being taught. I felt closer to God in those moments by myself and when closing my eyes for prayer I didn’t once sneak a peek to see who was peeking 😉

8.Go Somewhere Busy & People Watch

One of my favorite things to do when I lived in New York was to people watch. I could go to a sidewalk cafe and sit on the patio for hours just looking at the people rushing by. I’d make up stories in my head about their lives or where they were going and just get lost in the moment. People are so interesting to me, and if you pay close attention to them you may find out a little about yourself.

9. Go on a Bike Ride

I love riding my bike around my neighborhood, wind in my hair, going at the slow and steady speed I’m comfortable keeping, not having to keep the pace of someone else. I will admit it, I am not the most athletic person, so when I start a physical activity I usually like to start by myself so that I can test my endurance without feeling embarrassed for being so slow. Bike riding alone is one activity I really enjoy doing because not only am I able to  keep at my  own pace but it’s also a meditative activity in that if you find a nice path without much traffic you can really get lost in your own thoughts or lack thereof.

10. Create a Vision Board

Vision board parties have been popping up a lot lately, in fact I have an annual one with some of my girlfriends over the New Year. However I have one girlfriend who never attends. I asked her about it because it’s an activity that I know is right up her alley. Her explanation floored me and now I think I may adopt it. She said that creating a vision for yourself is a personal thing, one that requires you to really look within yourself and ask yourself what you really want. It’s hard to do that when you have a house full of people around you. You know how you hear something that rings so true but you don’t realize it until you hear it for the first time? Well that was one of those times and now I totally see why she doesn’t attend. I’m not saying  that I won’t attend a vision board party ever again, I’m just saying I can totally see how creating a vision for yourself, by yourself could be really fun. Plus you’d get all the good magazine clippings first 🙂

So what do you think of this list? Are there any activities I’m missing? Are there some you think you’d be comfortable trying? Let me know in the comments below!

 

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Comments

  1. Melissa says

    October 1, 2014 at 10:12 am

    Love the idea of creating a vision board! I need to do that. Last friday I also found myself alone, sitting on my couch watching a movie (Bridesmaids). At first it felt weird not having any plans, but later I quite enjoyed it!

  2. Betsy Mitchell says

    October 1, 2014 at 10:16 am

    Great list! My favorite thing to do by myself is my daily walk. It’s a great time to relax and destress.

  3. Jordan says

    October 1, 2014 at 11:26 am

    Love these ideas! I go to the park by myself all the time! Maybe I’ll blog about it soon haha.

  4. Alisha H. says

    October 1, 2014 at 11:27 am

    I have never been on a romantic picnic, but I’d love to go on one. I’ve been with my husband or ten years and it’s never happened.

  5. Fi says

    October 1, 2014 at 11:29 am

    I’m always alone on a Wednesday night as my son is sleeping and my partner is in college so I can’t do many of the things listed above as I have to stay home but now I want to watch Friends after seeing the video in your post 🙂

  6. Candace says

    October 1, 2014 at 12:03 pm

    I used to force myself, in my early twenties, to go to movies and dinner by myself. My parents were recently divorced and I wanted to make sure I felt good doing things alone before I met people to do them with. I think it was the greatest experiment for myself.

    xoxo
    Candace
    http://www.FromCtoC.com

  7. Kyeara says

    October 1, 2014 at 1:16 pm

    Movie dates alone are the best

  8. lisa diaz says

    October 1, 2014 at 1:42 pm

    I really enjoy spending time alone now. It really gives me time to have my own feelings & expressions of my own. When I was young, I just felt the peer pressure more. Sharing this post. Coming by from Lifestyle bloggers on FB.

  9. Angelic Sinova says

    October 1, 2014 at 1:52 pm

    Visiting museums are one of my favorite pastimes! I love to go and people watch <3

  10. Nancy says

    October 1, 2014 at 2:21 pm

    While I’m pretty independent, I’ve never gone to a movie by myself. I totally would do it, I just never thought about it. I seem to explore a lot on my own, so why not a movie too – especially a chickflick my husband wouldn’t want to go to.

  11. Lindsay says

    October 1, 2014 at 4:35 pm

    Aw I love this! I have been dying to go on a panic with my boyfriend 🙂

  12. Chelsea says

    October 1, 2014 at 4:54 pm

    I love doing things by myself! The only thing I don’t enjoy is eating alone, haha.

  13. kendall says

    October 1, 2014 at 7:17 pm

    Great ideas! A library visit sounds wonderful!

  14. GiGi Eats says

    October 1, 2014 at 8:42 pm

    Newly single over here – I need to remember that prior to this relationship I was single for 3.5 years!!!!! I love being independent , so I am going to take advantage of this list and ENJOY MYSELF!!!! 🙂

  15. Brenda says

    October 1, 2014 at 10:12 pm

    I love this post! I’ve been slowly working on doing more things on my own. Thanks for sharing!

  16. Marissa says

    October 2, 2014 at 7:28 am

    These are all really great things to do! Going out and exploring things on your own is so empowering!

  17. Jemma @ Celery and Cupcakes says

    October 2, 2014 at 7:35 am

    A vision board is a great idea. I fab way to get creative, but also remind yourself of your inspirations daily.

  18. Deidre says

    October 2, 2014 at 7:39 am

    All great ideas. Thanks for sharing!

  19. Erica says

    October 2, 2014 at 8:11 am

    When Harry Met Sally… LOVE! I definitely enjoyed this post because I’m not very independent. It’s a work in progress, but I admire those that are! 🙂

  20. brita says

    October 2, 2014 at 10:49 am

    I’m pretty introverted so I love doing things alone. One of my favorites is #8. I love sitting downtown and just people watch and take lots of pictures.

  21. Carly Anderson says

    October 2, 2014 at 11:00 am

    It is definitely nice sometimes to just relax by yourself! I love the idea of going to a museum by yourself. I feel like I would be able to personally reflect on the pieces more!

  22. JoAnn says

    October 2, 2014 at 11:08 am

    Love the idea of spending time by yourself alone! Now that I have two kids, I treasure my alone time 🙂

  23. Jessica Doll says

    October 2, 2014 at 11:20 am

    These are all great activities. I find when I do have any down time to myself which is very little and long in between I like to get pampered. I spend so much time taking care of everyone else that it feels nice to have someone take care of me.

  24. Stacy says

    October 2, 2014 at 11:34 am

    I LOVE this post!!!! I like being able to have a me night once in awhile, home alone without the kids or husband… It brings back the days of living on my own, doing my own thing… all the girly things that makes us happy LOL Cheers!

  25. Tammi says

    October 2, 2014 at 1:59 pm

    I love visiting museums by myself. I enjoy the quite, beautiful art, and alone time. I think it is a perfect destination!

  26. Joanna Sormunen says

    October 2, 2014 at 3:18 pm

    I’m a single mom, so I LOVE to have some time alone for myself. It doesn’t matter what I do, as long as there’s no one else around.

  27. Michelle says

    October 2, 2014 at 4:08 pm

    I think it’s so important for everyone–in a relationship or not–to be comfortable being with themselves, and to take time being alone. Thanks for this list!

  28. Avie says

    October 2, 2014 at 6:24 pm

    I really want to create something like a vision board, but more for inspiration for design. Sometimes I fall off the wagon and loose all creative juices and need something to inspire me to get back on that wagon!

  29. Alyssa says

    October 2, 2014 at 8:17 pm

    Sometimes having along time is nice. I love these ideas you have! Volunteering is my favorite! I volunteer at a homeless animal shelter and it’s the funnest!

  30. Michelle Snow says

    October 2, 2014 at 9:28 pm

    I actually really do like going to museums by myself when I can. That way I can spend as much time as I want looking at a particular piece without feeling rushed

  31. Ayana Pitterson says

    October 4, 2014 at 11:53 pm

    Shopping by myself is always a great thing. Call me crazy, but sometimes when I have Friday nights by myself I go to the grocery and walk each aisle in NO RUSH and do my weekly shopping. Love it.

    Thrifting Diva
    http://www.thriftingdiva.com

  32. Angela Livingston says

    October 6, 2014 at 6:41 pm

    These are great ideas! Before we had kids, when my husband was in the Navy, I spent a lot of time by myself. It was a great way to get to know my city.

  33. Tanisha says

    October 7, 2014 at 8:08 am

    Love this!!!!!!! Since I have a VERY large family….I’m constantly interacting with others…and because I’m simply amazing…my friends always wants to hang out. But those moments when I’m able to just be alone…I take full advantage of the kitchen…and make myself a full gourmet meal! Even just washing my own car or watering the grass…it takes a very special person to want to spend time alone and genuinely enjoy it!

  34. kristine foley says

    October 7, 2014 at 9:11 am

    Great list! I need to make time to have a me night and do some of these fun things!

  35. Jessica says

    October 7, 2014 at 7:57 pm

    Wonderful list! I love to take walks by myself. It’s a good way to destress from my day – and when I don’t have plans it makes me feel like I do!

  36. Krystal says

    October 8, 2014 at 12:00 pm

    I love this list! You are my spirit animal, Winter! All of these things sound awesome and I’ve even done (and loved) a few of them.

  37. Liv says

    October 10, 2014 at 9:36 am

    These are great! I would add take a trip alone! Even if it’s an hour away or abroad!!! Traveling solo is a great way to enjoy your own company!

  38. Lana Lou says

    October 10, 2014 at 9:17 pm

    I LOVE to bake goodies, and rent movies on iTunes, or dance around the house with loud music, OR go to movies alone all dressed up. it’s fun!

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